The Resturgence

What season am I in?

2011-07-11T20:12:00.001+10:00

The pendulum of my life seems to have has swung back into 'Ecclesiastes' for a bit. I wonder if it'll swing back as far as 'Job'... I hope not... I guess I'll find out in time.

But if physics has taught me anything, it's that nothing is lost. It's all potential energy. Perhaps, in time, I'll swing through and find myself in 'Song of Songs'. We'll see... I guess there's a time for everything (OK, yep, must definitely be in Ecclesiastes!)

2011-05-21T12:28:00.000+10:00

The soul longs for intense acceptance.
We need another in whose arms we can rest,
whose love transcends not only our failures,
but also our success.
We need a place where we can just be, and nothing more.
But who can ever fulfil such a request?

2011-04-13T17:15:00.002+10:00

Concrete hearts, with rebars of 'doctrine'

No water can be wrung from them

They must be struck,
And they will melt with tears;

truth only floats in rivers of love.

2011-04-01T11:21:00.000+11:00

The bible by itself is not enough -- it cannot be studied in a vacuum. The deep truth of God's word will be oversimplified and missed when it's not allowed to tangle with the complexities of human life.

We risk misreading His word when we don't let it read us.

Some verses for 2011

2011-03-26T21:22:00.004+11:00

I keep some bible verses stuck to my bedroom wall, verses which have some personal meaning to me, ones which I want to absorb into my heart (perhaps my mind as well, but my word-for-word memory is notoriously unreliable). I update these verses every now and then. Here a some new verses I've posted up:

Jeremiah 5:25 and Jeremiah 7:19

God's reactions to sin in the book of Jeremiah have astonished me. He is not only grieved, but He seems shocked, even perplexed. He does not understand why His people would do something as silly as turn from their life-source, to things that only do them harm. God seems to go through a whole range of reactions/emotions before He actually gets wrathful (it takes a lot to get Him angry). Even then, His aim is to purify and save a remnant. His love for His people and His desire to do them good is really evident in Jeremiah even in the midst of evil and judgement.

John 16:13-15

These are wonderfully Trinitarian verses. The Father gives the Son all that is His, and the Son in turn gives all that He's been given to His Spirit, who in turn makes it known to us. The Father gives us a relationship with Himself through and only through relationship with His Son and His Spirit. No greater intimacy exists.

Philippians 4:8

Kierkegaard once said, "our life always expressed the result of our dominant thoughts." I've found this to be true enough. Lately I haven't had full control of my mind, and have been thinking rather dull and careless thoughts. So I want to take the reigns of my mind and think the most honourable and loving thoughts I can.

I've also kept John 14:12-14 and John 15:12-13 on my wall; they seem too valuable to take down.

religion

2011-03-22T09:16:00.000+11:00

Wooden Jesus where are you from
Korea or Canada or maybe Taiwan
Well I didn't know it was the Holy Land
But I believed from the minute
The cheque left my hand, and I pray

Can I be saved, I spent all my money
On a future grave
Wooden Jesus I'll cut you in
On twenty percent of my future sin

Porcelain Mary her majesties pure
Looking for virgin territory
Coat hanger halos that don't come cheap
From television shepherds with
Living room sheep, and I pray

Can I be saved, I spent all my money
On a future grave
Wooden Jesus I'll cut you in
On twenty percent of my future sin

('Wooden Jesus' by Temple of the Dog; lyrics by Chris Cornell)

2011-03-18T13:18:00.000+11:00

Sometimes our lack of belief in ourselves is actually an underestimating of God, because it is only by His Spirit that we can do anything truly great. We don't need to muster up more self-belief; neither do we need to settle for mediocrity and call it 'humility'. We need to believe in God, and His desire and ability to work in us and through us.

2011-03-17T16:54:00.000+11:00

"Perhaps it's time to screw up our courage and attack the sacred cow: We must admit that simply knowing the contents of the Bible is not a sure route to spiritual growth. There is an awful assumption in evangelical circles that if we can just get the Word of God into people's heads, then the Spirit of God will apply it to their hearts. That assumption is awful, not because the Spirit never does what the assumption supposes, but because it has excused pastors and leaders from the responsibility to tangle with people's lives."

from Inside Out by Larry Crabb

Bro

2011-02-25T07:48:00.003+11:00

"Christian brotherhood is not an ideal but a divine reality."

—Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Balance manhood

2010-12-14T13:34:00.001+11:00

Manhood is not a choice between strength and sensitivity. There are two choices: between strength and weakness, and between sensitivity and callousness. You don't have to be callous to be strong, and you don't have to be weak to be sensitive.

Sensitivity without strength produces a sponge: a man who sucks the life out of others. Strength without sensitivity produces a wrecking ball: a man who destroys others.

Strength AND sensitivity produces a man who can be strong FOR others, a giver and protector of life.

Without God, the choice is always between a sponge and a wrecking ball. Only with God is it possible to love aright. The Spirit of Christ reproduces the nature of Christ in our hearts: Christ, who pitied us enough and was courageous enough to die on the cross for us. This is the ultimate picture of strength and sensitivity: to lay down one's life for others.

What is integrity?

2010-11-23T13:28:00.000+11:00

Integrity is the opposite of self-deception.

Integrity is a commitment to face life honestly and to face oneself honestly.
Integrity is a commitment to do what you say.

Was Jesus a Martyr?

2010-09-27T14:44:00.001+10:00

I would strongly suggest that the term 'martyr' should not be used to describe Jesus.

"Why cannot Christ be called a martyr? Because he was not a witness to truth but was 'the truth', and his death was not a martyrdom but the Atonement."

— Søren Kierkegaard

In the 3rd chapter of The Cross of Christ (pp. 87 – 92) John Stott contrasts Jesus' agony in Gethsemane with the joy of Christian martyrs of being counted worthy to die for God and anticipating being united with him. He concludes that if Jesus was distraught about undergoing mere physical suffering, then he would be the most cowardly of all the martyrs. Therefore, what Jesus was distressed about was the spiritual suffering he was about to undergo — the wrath of God, that is, being utterly cut off from him. This kind of suffering no martyr has ever or will ever have to undergo. No Christian martyr need ever cry "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"

Martyrs are killed by men because of their convictions (they believe in Jesus); they die as witnesses to the truth. Jesus was also killed because of his convictions (he believed he was God), but ultimately he did not die as a mere witness at the hands of men — he died for our sins at the hand of God! He not only physically suffered and died, but spiritually suffered and died. Separation from God is the essence of spiritual death. Martyrs rejoice in God being with them in their suffering, but the essence of Jesus' suffering was God not being with him.

It is impossible to know the suffering that Jesus underwent on the cross.

Kierkegaard on humility

2010-09-26T16:10:00.001+10:00

"God in heaven, let me rightly feel my nothingness, not to despair over it, but all the more intensely to feel the greatness of your goodness."

knowledge & love

2010-08-20T20:05:00.006+10:00

Nothing blinds us to love like the love of knowledge.
The love of knowledge is a dangerous thing.

Knowledge is a servant. Will it serve the purposes of love, or the purposes of your ego?
Will your knowledge of God bring you to your knees, or bolster your power over others?
Will you justify yourself by your knowledge, or will being known by God be your justification?

You know the Word by the letter. Do you know the mind of Christ?
You know the attributes of God. Do you know Him as "Abba! Father"?
You know your theology. Do you know your own heart?

You can think and speak, wielding words and ideas like swords.
Can you be still, and listen to the Spirit?

You can give potent answers. Do you know how to ask a potent question?
You have intelligence. Do you desire wisdom?

You can engage someone's mind.
Can you touch their heart?

The man who thinks he knows something does not yet know as he ought to know. But the man who loves God is known by God.
(1 Corinthians 8:2-3)

pure gift

2010-07-30T12:42:00.002+10:00

I want to share something that's increased my joy and satisfaction in God and life in the past two months like nothing else:

Resentment and gratitude cannot coexist, since resentment blocks the perception and experience of life as a gift. My resentment tells me that I don't receive what I deserve. It always manifests itself in envy.

Gratitude, however, goes beyond the 'mine' and 'thine' and claims the truth that all of life is a pure gift. In the past I always thought of gratitude as a spontaneous response to the awareness of gifts received, but now I realize that gratitude can also be lived as a discipline. The discipline of gratitude is the explicit effort to acknowledge that all I am and have is given to me as a gift of love, a gift to be celebrated with joy.

(from The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen, p.85, emphasis is mine)

Every time I feel something is lacking, when I want something I don't have, when I'm jealous or resentful, or simply bored, I 'preach' to myself: all of this is a gift. Your relationship with God is a gift that far exceeds all others, all other relationships are unearned, and the rest of creation is God's abundant generosity to you. And whatever is lacking now, God will restore in full at the resurrection.

Gratitude is so freeing; it frees you to enjoy everything for what it is. But, it also frees you to be sorrowful. You can mourn what is fallen and broken without being demanding or angry. That's healing, too.

Life is so much more enjoyable and free when deservedness is taken out of the equation! And God becomes 'bigger' too.

Truth and Mystery

2010-05-28T13:59:00.011+10:00

One of my favourite quotes is from Francis Bacon:

The job of the artist is always to deepen the mystery.

This doesn't mean the artist's job is to create confusion. It means the artist is to take us further out into the ocean of truth, and show us that it is much deeper than we thought. The artist doesn't explain; rather, the artist reveals—the same way that shining a bright light down into the ocean reveals its depth not because the light penetrates to the bottom, but because it doesn't. The artist refuses to explain truth by trying to fit it in a box; instead, the artist reveals truth by penetrating into it.

An explorer never conquers the wilderness. He can survive it, but he cannot make it obey him. It is he that must obey it, if he is to survive.

This quote from G. K. Chesterton sheds some light on this:

Poetry is sane because it floats easily in an infinite sea; reason seeks to cross the infinite sea, and so make it finite. ... To accept everything is an exercise, to understand everything a strain. The poet only desires exaltation and expansion, a world to stretch himself in. The poet only asks to get his head into the heavens. It is the logician who seeks to get the heavens into his head. And it is his head that splits.

Theologians have a lot to learn from artists. A theologian is supposed to be a poet, an adventurer! One who takes others deep into the mysteries of God, to reveal who He is and inspire awe and obedience. What a theologian must never do is seek to fit the infinite mysteries of God into people's head so He can be used. God is never to be used; he cannot be used. He is infinite, living, dynamic, and unconquerable. He is to be known on His terms, not ours, and obeyed for His own sake. He is a Person (actually, three Persons), not a formula.

He is to be loved, not solved. How can we worship something we can fit in a box? The artist can shows us that God doesn't fit in a box. And he does this not by explaining, but by revealing. This is in essence what the quote from Francis Bacon means to me.

Flaming Jesus

2010-04-12T10:26:00.000+10:00

I'm going to start praying to Jesus as seen in Revelation 1. I don't think I've pictured Jesus like that before, like He is now. But I know I will be talking less.

So many questions

2010-03-30T09:44:00.001+11:00

I am finding it SO hard to concentrate on anything right now! I have questions and topics that I simply must explore!

What is the ultimate reason for which Jesus sacrificed Himself - and what are the implications of that for our worship of Him?
What are the implications of the Trinity for the cross of Christ, and vice versa?
What are the implications of the (1) Trinity, and (2) the incarnation, for our understanding of the nature of God's Kingdom?
How does the Trinity, and the incarnation, affect our understanding of God's glory?
How do His Kingdom, His church, and His glory tie together? And from a Trinitarian perspective?
What are the implications of the Trinity for creation?
What is worship?
How do we advance God's Kingdom (every day)?

For His sake, or for my sake?

2010-03-20T10:38:00.005+11:00

Lately I've been struck at how stuck I am - stuck in my self. Am I really living for Jesus, or just for myself?

Listen to Oswald Chambers:

"We utilize God for the sake of getting peace and joy, that is, we do not realize Jesus Christ, but only our enjoyment of Him. This is the first step in a wrong direction."*

Listen to Larry Crabb's comments:

"Do we see the danger Chamber's finger is on? It's very subtle. Jesus Christ does satisfy our souls, but not always right away..."

"If we value our satisfaction in Christ more than Christ Himself, we remain committed to ourselves and not Christ. We may think we're committed to Him, and in a sense we are - but only as a means to an end. The end is not Christ's glory; the end is our satisfaction."**

We may think we're worshiping God, when all we're really doing is using Him.

I should seek satisfaction in Christ, I need to drink from the rivers of living water He offers me. He is glorified by that.
But am I willing to endure those times when He hides His face? Will I wait for Him, or will I get annoyed at Him? Do I experience my desire for Him as a longing, or an entitlement?

Listen to Augustine:

"There can be only two basic loves, the love of God unto the forgetfulness of self, or the love of self unto the forgetfulness of God."

There are steps in our growth of love as humans.
We all begin with loving ourselves for our own sake. This is our natural state of sin. We are self-dependently self-serving.
When God converts us, we begin loving God for our own sake. We realise that we are not enough; only God can rescue us from our helpless state. We become dependent on God, but we still have our own interests at heart.
God isn't finished. He changes us further. As we become more like Christ, we slowly begin loving God for His own sake. God's heart becomes ours; we start wanting what He wants most. We begin loving God for who He is in and of Himself, not just for His what He provides for us. We become truly God-centered.***

Our destiny as human beings is to have God at the center of our universe. We are made to become completely other-centered beings. Holy.
Just like God - Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, enjoying and loving and glorifying one another. We get to join them. This is God's kingdom.

All this highlights how sinful I am! It hurts! But it also fills me with hope - there is so much more to the Christian life that I've yet to experience.
God is changing us. We are powerless to lift ourselves up out of our selves, but we can repent and ask God to lift us up into Himself. And He can do it. It may take a whole life time, but He will do it.

---

* Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest (Westwood, N.J.: Barbour, 1935), 140, July 11.

** Larry Crabb, The PAPA Prayer, p.57

***This idea was first put into words by Bernard of Clairvaux. He also had a fourth step: loving ourselves for God's sake.

Questions

2010-03-07T20:53:00.002+11:00

A good question is like a good compass.
It's not usually answers that set you in the right direction, but the right questions.
Answers are best when they lead to more questions.

People generally feel more invited to get to know (and get known by) someone who asks good questions, than someone who has all the answers.
Questions are doors-openers.

It is only possible to ask good questions - and stick with them - when you have no need to be in control.
To the person who's high priority is self-preservation - answers provide safety; questions represent danger. Life becomes pursuing the illusion of control.

The only alternative to control is trust.
Trusting God is the only way to be free enough to ask fruitful questions.
To the person who trusts God - questions are an invitation to adventure; and answers simply lead to deeper questions. Life becomes about discovering God.

grace

2010-02-08T21:47:00.001+11:00

Be intentionally gracious to the people you encounter each day. Whether you know them or not. You don't know who has had a bad day. You don't know who is carrying deep wounds. God can use even a brief and simple interaction to bring about healing.

7 essential questions

2010-01-24T22:04:00.006+11:00

Dr. Larry Crabb, Psychologist and Author, asks and answers seven essential questions of life that encourage believers to be sensitive to God.

Here are some fundamental, profound and deeply encouraging truths - things which have more than helped me in the face of discouragement and have energized me in my pursuit of God and the life He offers. I've listened to this message several times, over the space of the past year or so. Do listen.

(The video stream doesn't work for me, only the audio - if it doesn't work for either, you can download the mp4 video here).

original link

Understanding Romans 6:14

2010-01-17T13:01:00.006+11:00

Romans 6:14

For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace.

I've struggled with the meaning of this verse for something like 3 or 4 years. And I've only just begun to understand it properly. I read it today and the meaning of it came to me, because lately I've been experiencing the truth that it's talking about.

I think the key to understanding it is understanding the character of God, and how He relates to us under the New Covenant. The trouble I've had in interpreting it has to do with me leaving God out of the picture! (Dietrich Bonhoeffer once emphasised that in theology, we must give priority to the question of who over how. He was right).

Let me explain in simple terms. Imagine trying to live your life with:

1) a God who is looking down on you, frowning in scrutiny

versus

2) a God who is looking upon you, smiling in delight

So many Christians are living scenario 1, and I think it's everyone's default belief. But Romans 6:14 is saying that actually, scenario 2 is our reality.

Amazing.

So if you want to live in freedom under grace, get to know the God who gives it.

He's smiling :)

My Resolutions for 2010 (and beyond)

2010-01-10T12:07:00.011+11:00

O.k.! So I've spent a month posting someone else's resolutions. What about my own? Well, I've come up with 15 of my own resolutions, which I'm really happy with. I'm looking forward to this year and what it might hold.

I actually wasn't going to post these, but a friend of mine asked me if I was, and I thought 'why not?' One reason might be that they feel quite personal - not private, but personal - because they're either dealing with my personal relationship with God, or they are addressing a personal weakness. But, I've posted them anyway in case they are of any help.

If you know me, feel free to keep me accountable!

Resolutions for 2010

Relationship with God:

1) Work on my friendship with the Holy Spirit. Learn to walk in step with Him.

2) Get to know the Father better. Learn to call Him 'Abba' and find my sense of belonging with Him (to put it Trinitarian terms: I want live Galatians 4:6 - And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, "Abba! Father!").

3) Gain a wider and deeper understanding of Christ as my mediating, interceding High Priest.

4) Spend more time in silence in the presence of God, seeking the knowledge of Him that surpasses understanding ('gut' knowledge).

5) Spend more time in Scripture, and try to read, study, and meditate on it with new eyes.

Relationship with others:

6) Let go of my fears of rejection and need for approval, so I can get to know new people and relate more freely to my friends. I want my relationships to be characterised by grace.

7) Aim to first see Christ loving each person in my life, and join Him in His loving them.

8) Take more initiative, and plan each week better, to arrange social events and catch-ups (this includes increasing my knowledge of things to do in Melbourne! Creativity may be required).

9) Less idling on Facebook!

10) As a minimum regular commitment, set aside 15 minutes every evening for intercessory prayer for my friends and my church.

Ministry:

11) Whatever blessings God gives me in the knowledge of Himself, to earnestly desire and pray the same blessings for others, and to have the courage to do what I can to impart those blessings (primarily through conversations - the most challenging but also most personal and effective means).

12) Pursue to understand things with my heart as much as my head, and aim to share my heart-knowledge as much as my head-knowledge.

13) Put my full confidence in God - His authority and His power to make me bear fruit - so that I have the courage and boldness to do what I would otherwise not if I had needed to trust in myself. Too often I have been unsure of myself - I no longer want to doubt God's hand on my life.

14) Purge myself of the fear of man so I can be a leader of men; purge myself of pride so I can be a servant of men (I believe these are two different ways of saying the same thing).

15) Recognise what is within my control and prayerfully attend to it, and recognise what is outside of my control and trustfully dedicate it to God in prayer.

I can only do these things with God’s help, by His power, and for God’s sake, and I can only do them in-so-far as God does them in me, so I put my confidence in Him. Lord, help me glorify You! Amen.

In addition, I identified my top three enemies (which I won't name here), which must be immediately and violently dealt with whenever they raise their heads - whether in the form of an attitude, a believed falsehood, a temptation or a sin.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (58-70), and my next adventure...

2010-01-09T16:38:00.003+11:00

Okay, to be honest: I lost interest in posting Edwards' Resolutions! I'm posting the last fourteen at once. I'm definitely not done with Edwards though; I hope to read some of his work in the near future. If you want to learn more about who Johnny Edwards is, John Piper gives a good talk about his life and ministry.

But why the waned interest? Besides the fact that Edwards' Resolutions are just plain intimidating (to the point where I think they can be as unhelpful as they are helpful), my attention has been completely taken over with my next and long-awaited adventure: exploring the Trinity. I could have said 'the doctrine of the Trinity', but this is turning into a very personal journey and not just a theological exploration. If you want to know what I've read, am reading, and plan to read, check out my booklist on LivingSocial. I've just finished Experiencing the Trinity by Darrell Johnson and I'm currently reading Worship, Community & the Triune God of Grace by James Torrance. This is going to make for some great blog posts in the near future, I'm sure - but not quite yet. I will say this though: I'm learning that our understanding and experience of God as Trinity is a HUGE matter, because it's about who God is in and of Himself! It affects everything else. This is changing my relationship with God, who I am, how I relate to others, and what I will do with the rest of my life.

I'd recommend you find a copy of Johnson's Experiencing the Trinity if you want to begin a journey of knowing God in His three-fold-ness. Please do it!

And finally, here is the last of Resolutions for Life:

58. Resolved, not only to refrain from an air of dislike, fretfulness, and anger in conversation, but to exhibit an air of love, cheerfulness and benignity.

59. Resolved, when I am most conscious of provocations to ill nature and anger, that I will strive most to feel and act good-naturedly; yea, at such times, to manifest good nature, though I think that in other respects it would be disadvantageous, and so as would be imprudent at other times.

60. Resolved, whenever my feelings begin to appear in the least out of order, when I am conscious of the least uneasiness within, or the least irregularity without, I will then subject myself to the strictest examination.

61. Resolved, that I will not give way to that listlessness which I find unbends and relaxes my mind from being fully and fixedly set on religion, whatever excuse I may have for it-that what my listlessness inclines me to do, is best to be done, etc.

62. Resolved, never to do anything but duty; and then according to Eph. 6:6-8, do it willingly and cheerfully as unto the Lord, and not to man; "knowing that whatever good thing any man doth, the same shall he receive of the Lord."

63. On the supposition, that there never was to be but one individual in the world, at any one time, who was properly a complete Christian, in all respects of a right stamp, having Christianity always shining in its true luster, and appearing excellent and lovely, from whatever part and under whatever character viewed: Resolved, to act just as I would do, if I strove with all my might to be that one, who should live in my time.

64. Resolved, when I find those "groanings which cannot be uttered" (Rom. 8:26), of which the Apostle speaks, and those "breakings of soul for the longing it hath," of which the Psalmist speaks, Psalm 119:20, that I will promote them to the utmost of my power, and that I will not be weary, of earnestly endeavoring to vent my desires, nor of the repetitions of such earnestness.

65. Resolved, very much to exercise myself in this all my life long, viz. with the greatest openness I am capable of, to declare my ways to God, and lay open my soul to him: all my sins, temptations, difficulties, sorrows, fears, hopes, desires, and every thing, and every circumstance; according to Dr. Manton's 27th Sermon on Psalm 119.

66. Resolved, that I will endeavor always to keep a benign aspect, and air of acting and speaking in all places, and in all companies, except it should so happen that duty requires otherwise.

67. Resolved, after afflictions, to inquire, what I am the better for them, what good I have got by them, and what I might have got by them.

68. Resolved, to confess frankly to myself all that which I find in myself, either infirmity or sin; and, if it be what concerns religion, also to confess the whole case to God, and implore needed help.

69. Resolved, always to do that, which I shall wish I had done when I see others do it.

70. Let there be something of benevolence, in all that I speak.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (50-57)

2009-12-30T14:22:00.000+11:00

50. Resolved, I will act so as I think I shall judge would have been best, and most prudent, when I come into the future world.

51. Resolved, that I will act so, in every respect, as I think I shall wish I had done, if I should at last be damned.

52. I frequently hear persons in old age say how they would live, if they were to live their lives over again: Resolved, that I will live just so as I can think I shall wish I had done, supposing I live to old age.

53. Resolved, to improve every opportunity, when I am in the best and happiest frame of mind, to cast and venture my soul on the Lord Jesus Christ, to trust and confide in him, and consecrate myself wholly to him; that from this I may have assurance of my safety, knowing that I confide in my Redeemer.

54. Whenever I hear anything spoken in conversation of any person, if I think it would be praiseworthy in me, Resolved to endeavor to imitate it.

55. Resolved, to endeavor to my utmost to act as I can think I should do, if I had already seen the happiness of heaven, and hell torments.

56. Resolved, never to give over, nor in the least to slacken my fight with my corruptions, however unsuccessful I may be.

57. Resolved, when I fear misfortunes and adversities, to examine whether I have done my duty, and resolve to do it; and let it be just as providence orders it, I will as far as I can, be concerned about nothing but my duty and my sin.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (43-49)

2009-12-28T23:51:00.001+11:00

43. Resolved, never henceforward, till I die, to act as if I were any way my own, but entirely and altogether God's, agreeable to what is to be found in Saturday, January 12.

44. Resolved, that no other end but religion, shall have any influence at all on any of my actions; and that no action shall be, in the least circumstance, any otherwise than the religious end will carry it.
45. Resolved, never to allow any pleasure or grief, joy or sorrow, nor any affection at all, nor any degree of affection, nor any circumstance relating to it, but what helps religion.

46. Resolved, never to allow the least measure of any fretting uneasiness at my father or mother. Resolved to suffer no effects of it, so much as in the least alteration of speech, or motion of my eve: and to be especially careful of it, with respect to any of our family.

47. Resolved, to endeavor to my utmost to deny whatever is not most agreeable to a good, and universally sweet and benevolent, quiet, peaceable, contented, easy, compassionate, generous, humble, meek, modest, submissive, obliging, diligent and industrious, charitable, even, patient, moderate, forgiving, sincere temper; and to do at all times what such a temper would lead me to. Examine strictly every week, whether I have done so.

48. Resolved, constantly, with the utmost niceness and diligence, and the strictest scrutiny, to be looking into the state of my soul, that I may know whether I have truly an interest in Christ or no; that when I come to die, I may not have any negligence respecting this to repent of.

49. Resolved, that this never shall be, if I can help it.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (36-42)

2009-12-26T18:03:00.004+11:00

36. Resolved, never to speak evil of any, except I have some particular good call for it.

37. Resolved, to inquire every night, as I am going to bed, wherein I have been negligent, what sin I have committed, and wherein I have denied myself: also at the end of every week, month and year.

38. Resolved, never to speak anything that is ridiculous, sportive, or matter of laughter on the Lord's Day.

39. Resolved, never to do anything that I so much question the lawfulness of, as that I intend, at the same time, to consider and examine afterwards, whether it be lawful or no; except I as much question the lawfulness of the omission.

40. Resolved, to inquire every night, before I go to bed, whether I have acted in the best way I possibly could, with respect to eating and drinking.

41. Resolved, to ask myself at the end of every day, week, month and year, wherein I could possibly in any respect have done better.

42. Resolved, frequently to renew the dedication of myself to God, which was made at my baptism; which I solemnly renewed, when I was received into the communion of the church; and which I have solemnly re-made this twelfth day of January, 1722-23.

I'm not sure what Edwards means by 'matter of laughter' in resolution #38. If he means he won't laugh or make jokes, I can't agree with it. He may not be saying that though; there is a slight language barrier. But I do believe seriousness and laughter can coexist, and must.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (29-35)

2009-12-20T23:36:00.002+11:00

I think it should be mentioned, at this point, that these are Edwards' personal resolutions. He wrote them for himself, and not for someone else. I think there's so much to gain from reading them (like being challenged to aim higher!), but I don't think they should be simply transferred onto your own life. Make your own list of resolutions, and use Edwards' list to help you think about what resolutions are worth making. Edwards wrote these over a period of about one year, I think, so he obviously took care in writing each one, basing them on careful study of God, His word and will, himself, and what he personally wanted to achieve with his life (I'm just assuming here; I can't see how else he could have come up with what he did!)

I think I might start making my own resolutions in January. We'll see :)

29. Resolved, never to count that a prayer, nor to let that pass as a prayer, nor that as a petition of a prayer, which is so made, that I cannot hope that God will answer it; nor that as a confession, which I cannot hope God will accept.

30. Resolved, to strive to my utmost every week to be brought higher in religion, and to a higher exercise of grace, than I was the week before.

31. Resolved, never to say anything at all against anybody, but when it is perfectly agreeable to the highest degree of Christian honor, and of love to mankind, agreeable to the lowest humility, and sense of my own faults and failings, and agreeable to the golden rule; often, when I have said anything against anyone, to bring it to, and try it strictly by the test of this Resolution.

32. Resolved, to be strictly and firmly faithful to my trust, that that in Prov. 20:6, "A faithful man who can find?" may not be partly fulfilled in me.

33. Resolved, always to do what I can towards making, maintaining, establishing and preserving peace, when it can be without over-balancing detriment in other respects.

34. Resolved, in narrations never to speak anything but the pure and simple verity.

35. Resolved, whenever I so much question whether I have done my duty, as that my quiet and calm is thereby disturbed, to set it down, and also how the question was resolved.

Tweeting the Trinity

2009-12-14T22:16:00.001+11:00

I love the fact that God is Trinity - One Being who is three Persons in perfect, loving, dynamic, glorifying relationships. I think the doctrine of the Trinity should be taught more, talked about more, and enjoyed more. There's nothing more fundamental than understanding who God really is. It affects everything else.

One of the issues surrounding this doctrine is that it's often perceived as complicated, abstract, and best left to the 'theologians'. This is a tragedy, because the doctrine of the Trinity is also simple, very practical, and every Christian's business.

So I've decided to use Twitter's 140 characters to post some thoughts on the Trinity (I'm also using Facebook statuses). I figure there's nothing like Twitter or Facebook to force you to simplify something, so it will be a good exercise for me personally and hopefully I can get other Christians thinking about (and more importantly, celebrating) the Trinity.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (22-28)

2009-12-13T14:18:00.001+11:00

22. Resolved, to endeavor to obtain for myself as much happiness, in the other world, as I possibly can, with all the power, might, vigor, and vehemence, yea violence, I am capable of, or can bring myself to exert, in any way that can be thought of.

23. Resolved, frequently to take some deliberate action, which seems most unlikely to be done, for the glory of God, and trace it back to the original intention, designs and ends of it; and if I find it not to be for God's glory, to repute it as a breach of the 4th Resolution.

24. Resolved, whenever I do any conspicuously evil action, to trace it back, till I come to the original cause; and then both carefully endeavor to do so no more, and to fight and pray with all my might against the original of it.

25. Resolved, to examine carefully, and constantly, what that one thing in me is, which causes me in the least to doubt of the love of God; and to direct all my forces against it.

26. Resolved, to east away such things, as I find do abate my assurance.

27. Resolved, never willfully to omit anything, except the omission be for the glory of God; and frequently to examine my omissions.

28. Resolved, to study the Scriptures so steadily, constantly and frequently, as that I may find, and plainly perceive myself to grow in the knowledge of the same.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (15-21)

2009-12-10T12:49:00.002+11:00

15. Resolved, never to suffer the least motions of anger to irrational beings.

16. Resolved, never to speak evil of anyone, so that it shall tend to his dishonor, more or less, upon no account except for some real good.

17. Resolved, that I will live so as I shall wish I had done when I come to die.

18. Resolved, to live so at all times, as I think is best in my devout frames, and when I have clearest notions of things of the gospel, and another world.

19. Resolved, never to do anything, which I should be afraid to do, if I expected it would not be above an hour, before I should hear the last trump.

20. Resolved, to maintain the strictest temperance in eating and drinking.

21. Resolved, never to do anything, which if I should see in another, I should count a just occasion to despise him for, or to think any way the more meanly of him.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (8-14)

2009-12-05T21:09:00.001+11:00

8. Resolved, to act, in all respects, both speaking and doing, as if nobody had been so vile as I, and as if I had committed the same sins, or had the same infirmities or failings as others; and that I will let the knowledge of their failings promote nothing but shame in myself, and prove only an occasion of my confessing my own sins and misery to God.

9. Resolved, to think much on all occasions of my own dying, and of the common circumstances which attend death.

10. Resolved, when I feel pain, to think of the pains of martyrdom, and of hell.

11. Resolved, when I think of any theorem in divinity to be solved, immediately to do what I can towards solving it, if circumstances don't hinder.

12. Resolved, if I take delight in it as a gratification of pride, or vanity, or on any such account, immediately to throw it by.

13. Resolved, to be endeavoring to find out fit objects of charity and liberality.

14. Resolved, never to do anything out of revenge.

Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions (1-7)

2009-11-20T21:59:00.004+11:00

The new year is approaching - the time for resolutions! If you're up for the challenge (and it is a challenge... I'm not sure what make me think I'm fit to present it!), I invite you to join me in reading and meditating on Jonathan Edwards' resolutions for life (thanks to Sam Storms for the article).

There are 70 resolutions which Edwards wrote for himself, between 1722 and 1723. He was 19 at the time (!). I will make 10 posts, 7 resolutions at time, to get through all 70 resolutions by the end of the year. Honestly, If this doesn't set your heart burning and on your face before God, begging for his help, I'm not sure what will. Ready? Let's begin.

Being sensible that I am unable to do anything without God's help, I do humbly entreat him by his grace to enable me to keep these Resolutions, so far as they are agreeable to his will, for Christ's sake.

Remember to read over these Resolutions once a week.

1. Resolved, that I will do whatsoever I think to be most to God's glory, and my own good, profit and pleasure, in the whole of my duration, without any consideration of the time, whether now, or never so many myriad's of ages hence. Resolved to do whatever I think to be my duty and most for the good and advantage of mankind in general. Resolved to do this, whatever difficulties I meet with, how many and how great soever.

2. Resolved, to be continually endeavoring to find out some new invention and contrivance to promote the aforementioned things.

3. Resolved, if ever I shall fall and grow dull, so as to neglect to keep any part of these Resolutions, to repent of all I can remember, when I come to myself again.

4. Resolved, never to do any manner of thing, whether in soul or body, less or more, but what tends to the glory of God; nor be, nor suffer it, if I can avoid it.

5. Resolved, never to lose one moment of time; but improve it the most profitable way I possibly can.

6. Resolved, to live with all my might, while I do live.

7. Resolved, never to do anything, which I should be afraid to do, if it were the last hour of my life.

To be continued.

'This is War'

2009-11-04T20:00:00.001+11:00

...is a song by Dustin Kensrue. I just love it. Any song that's a break from the throng of cliché Christians songs, I welcome with open arms. Listen to 'This is War' here on his myspace site (just scroll down a little on the song list). These are the awesome lyrics:

This is war like you ain't seen.
This winter's long, it's cold and mean.
With hangdog hearts we stood condemned,
But the tide turns now at Bethlehem.

This is war and born tonight,
The Word as flesh, the Lord of Light,
The Son of God, the low-born king;
Who demons fear, of whom angels sing.

This is war on sin and death;
The dark will take it's final breath.
It shakes the earth, confounds all plans;
The mystery of God as man.

Quotes from John Owen

2009-10-29T17:53:00.001+11:00

"See in the meantime that your faith brings forth obedience, and God in due time will cause it to bring forth peace."

"If we do not abide in prayer, we will abide in temptation."

"Your state is not at all to be measured by the opposition that sin makes to you, but by the opposition you make to it."

Creature, not Creator

2009-10-27T10:56:00.003+11:00

Things that remind us we are not God:

breathing
hunger
sleep
not knowing
stress
history
the universe

How to blow your mind

2009-10-26T15:36:00.001+11:00

Contemplate life in eternity, 10,000 years from now... 1,000,000 years from now... 100 million years from now... a million million years from now. Go for a walk and spend some time doing this. Then, in your mind, return from eternity and contemplate life in the present. Passages like this start making sense:

1 Peter 1:3-6

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials. . .

The (original) good news precedes the bad

2009-10-24T22:27:00.003+11:00

Concerning the gospel, you've probably heard it said that people must hear the bad news (of sin) before they can understand the good news (of Christ) as good.

What I hear emphasised less often is that the good news (of creation) must be heard before the bad news really makes sense. I think the importance if this is usually underestimated.

God is good, and he was in the beginning. Then he created the universe and called it good, and after creating human beings he was able to call it all very good. (Genesis 1:31)

The bad news of sin is bad, because it destroyed our connection with the good God, and it spoiled the goodness of creation. The good news is good because, in Christ, God is reconciling all things to Himself! (Colossians 1:20). The gospel message is that Christ restores the human soul to connection with God, and (upon his return) will restore all of creation.

I think it's important that people see Christianity, and Christians, affirming the goodness of creation (including the goodness of being made in God's image*), and explaining why sin is bad for us. When people see that sin means loss (at least from humanity's perspective**), they may want to know more about how to gain back what was lost.

*Sin seriously corrupts our God-image, but it does not destroy it. We no longer bear a moral resemblance to God, but we are still personal beings like God, who think, feel, and relate. Moral goodness is lost, but the goodness of creation is not.

**Ultimately, sin is bad not mainly because humanity suffers loss and judgment as a result, but because it violates God's goodness. But in order to convince the human heart to hand itself over to Christ, an appeal needs to be made to it's own need of the gospel. No-one becomes a Christian because they want to glorify God. The desire to glorify Him is the result, not the cause.

Romans will get me through the next week/month/year

2009-10-12T20:34:00.005+11:00

Romans 5:1-4 (NIV)

¹Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, ²through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. ³Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; ⁴perseverance, character; and character, hope. ⁵And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

If you love to read, read this

2009-10-09T15:59:00.010+11:00

I love books. If you love books too, and you read a lot of Christian literature, please read this article by A.W. Tozer (split into 5 short parts, below). I found it so helpful, and it will do you a tonne of good too. It's 50 or so years old (noticeably at a couple of points), but that barely affect its relevance. There are big pitfalls for those who love knowledge and reading, and this really helps to remind you why and how you should read (in particular, Christian literature) to gain the most out of it.

What Should a Book Do for Us?

Books Good and Bad

Speed And Memorizing

Reading for Verbal Skill

If We Would Understand, We Must BE and DO

(by the way, I read the article in this book, which is a compilation of editorial essays written by A.W. Tozer).

Discipleship is Grace! (2)

2009-10-07T19:01:00.012+11:00

I had forgotten the quote that seized me and framed my thinking in my previous post, but I just found it:

"The only man who has the right to say that he is justified by grace alone is the man who has left all to follow Christ. Such a man knows that the call to discipleship is a gift of grace, and that the call is inseparable from the grace."

- The Cost of Discipleship, chapter 1, p.51

Discipleship is Grace!

2009-10-04T22:38:00.016+11:00

I've begun reading The Cost of Discipleship by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. The first chapter, which is as far as I've got, is challenging (to understate it!) and encouraging. This is a really important book.

The most powerful thought for me, expressed by Bonhoeffer, is that the grace that forgives is also the grace that calls us to follow Jesus. It wouldn't be putting it too strongly to say that to be forgiven is to be called - the two never exist apart. The following is from the closing of chapter one:

"Happy are they who know that discipleship simply means the life which springs from grace, and that grace simply means discipleship."

I think my repentance may change from now on. I can longer hear the words 'I forgive you' without also hearing in them the words 'follow me'. How sweet it is, to not only know your sins have been blotted out, but that you still have your place as a disciple!

Jesus' command - 'follow me' - is grace.

The wrong solution to loneliness

2009-10-01T10:53:00.009+10:00

"There is much mental suffering in our world. But some of it is suffering for the wrong reason because it is born out of the false expectation that we are called to take each other's loneliness away. When our loneliness drives us away from ourselves into the arms of our companions in life, we are, in fact, driving ourselves into excruciating relationships, tiring friendships and suffocating embraces. To wait for moments or places where no pain exists, no separation is felt and where all human restlessness has turned into inner peace is waiting for a dreamworld. No friend or lover, no husband or wife, no community or commune will be able to put to rest our deepest cravings for unity and wholeness. And by burdening others with these divine expectations, of which we ourselves are often only partially aware, we might inhibit the expression of free friendship and love and evoke instead feelings of inadequacy and weakness. Friendship and love cannot develop in the form of an anxious clinging to each other. They ask for a gentle fearless space in which we can move to and from each other. As long as our loneliness brings us together with the hope that together we no longer will be alone, we castigate each other with our unfulfilled and unrealistic desire for oneness, inner tranquility and the uninterrupted experience of communion."

- Reaching Out, chapter 1, p.29-30

On counseling

2009-09-22T10:49:00.007+10:00

"From the point of view of a Christian spirituality, it is important to stress that every human being is called upon to be a healer. Although there are many professions asking for special long and arduous training, we can never leave the task of healing to the specialist. In fact, the specialists can only retain their humanity in their work when they see their professions as a form of service which they carry out, not instead of, but as a part of, the whole people of God. We all are healers who can reach out to offer health, and we all are patients in constant need of help. Only this realization can keep professionals from becoming distant technicians and those in need of care from feeling used or manipulated.
The danger of specialization, therefore, is probably not so much with the specialists as with the nonspecialists, who tend to underestimate their own human potentials and quickly make a referral to those who have titles, thereby leaving their own creative power unused. ...
We can do much more for each other than we often are aware of."

- Reaching Out, chapter 5, p.93, 94

Demanding too much of others

2009-09-19T11:36:00.010+10:00

"Our human relationships easily become subject to violence and destruction when we treat our own and other people's lives as properties to be defended or conquered and not as gifts to be recieved. We often see in the center of an intimate relationship the seeds of violence. The borders between kissing and biting, caressing and slapping, hearing and overhearing, looking with tenderness and looking with suspicion are very fragile indeed. ... When our unfulfilled needs lead us to demand from our fellow human beings what they cannot give, we make them into idols and ourselves into devils. By asking for more than a human response we are tempted to behave as less than human."

- Reaching Out, chapter 7, p.119

The size of God

2009-09-17T10:44:00.009+10:00

"Just as God cannot be 'caught' or 'comprehended' in any specific idea, concept, opinion, or conviction, he cannot be defined by any specific feeling or emotion either. ... God is not just our good inclinations, our fervor, our generosity or our love. All these experiences of the heart may remind us of God's presence, but their absence does not prove God's absence. God is not only greater than our mind, he is also greater than our heart, and just as we have to avoid the temptation of adapting God to our small concepts we also have to avoid adapting him to our small feelings."

- Reaching Out, chapter 6, p.106

'Reaching Out'

2009-09-16T18:14:00.008+10:00

I'm reading a book by a Catholic author at the moment (Henri J. M. Nouwen, who died in 1996), called Reaching Out. It's brilliant, intruiging, a bit too abstract at times, but unlike anything I've read before. It's difficult to describe, but I'll try - it's about the Christian life, or Christian spirituality. It's a theology of the heart. Nouwen reflects on the dynamics of our transforming relationships with our self, others, and God. He calls them the 'three movements': from loneliness to solitude, from hostility to hospitality, and from illusion to prayer.

Anyway, I thought I'd spend the next few future posts just quoting from it. It's immensely quotable.

Two Freeing Epiphanies

2009-08-14T15:10:00.003+10:00

1. The whole meaning of life is to enjoy God!

2. The greatest service I can give to another is to get myself happy in God!

I am free to do, and should always do, whatever maximises my joy in God! I just realised this (again) today! I've never been happier (again). Life is utterly meaningless apart from this. And what's more, in case I think this way of living is selfish: I actually have nothing really worth giving to others unless my heart is full of joy in God, and neither will I be willing to sacrifice anything for another unless I have joy in God. That's a thought which is both sobering and freeing.

Get happy in God!

Two Unmanly Ways of Living

2009-08-06T17:19:00.024+10:00

Men tend to live for personal comfort, or live to prove themselves.

I've gathered the following thoughts from observing myself, friends, and a few books I've read. I think most of us manage to live for both these goals, but tend to lean towards one way more than the other (because either way of living involves some degree of sacrifice from the other). There are similarities in the way men and women approach life, but I believe there are also significant differences. Our approaches to life are 'coloured' differently. So while I suppose a lot of this could apply to women, I am writing with myself and other dudes in mind.

Living for Personal Comfort

victim-based identity
sleeping in
procrastination
promise-breaking (disguised as 'fexibility')
whinging and complaining (disguised as 'sharing' and 'openess')

If you live for personal comfort, you complain a lot when around other people. This serves as a way to attract sympathy. You also sleep in a lot, because staying physically comfortable is more important than tackling the day productively. You procrastinate, because working hard is uncomfortable, and the fear of failure is uncomfortable. You also break your promises or avoid making any, because keeping promises often involves self-sacrifice (check out Psalm 14:4b). When threatened with great difficulty or fear, you run to a quick source of relief (food, internet, porn, video games, etc).

Your deepest fear is having to face a situation where strength is required of you.

Living to Prove Yourself

achievements/reputation-based identity
burnout
defensiveness
acting tough
talking too much about yourself

You find your identity in what you can contribute or what you have achieved. This produces a fair bit of pressure to live up to your standards, and you often feel like you fall short - so you work too hard, which sometimes results in exhaustion and loss of motivation. You feel the pressure to hold up an image of competence when around other people. You do not feel free to display weakness. When your reputation-based identity is threatened, you become defensive (a clear giveaway that you are actually a weak man). You feel superior to those who complain or display weakness, and you enjoy saying 'suck it up, princess' more than you should. You are quick to rely on yourself, and slow to rely on others. You talk a lot about yourself - you don't notice this, but others do.

Your deepest fear is discovering that you have no real substance.

As you can see, it's pretty much the same fear that lies beneath both ways of living; I think the difference is that those who live for comfort are more convinced of their insubstantiality than those who live to prove themselves. Lovers of comfort deny their weakness by finding ways to feel good (self-pity); men who try to prove themselves deny their weakness by trying to convince themselves and others that they actually are strong (pride).

Another Way

repentance
'image of God'-based identity
self-giving, self-sacrificial, other-person-centered living

Ezekiel 36:25-27

²⁵ I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you shall be clean from all your uncleannesses, and from all your idols I will cleanse you. ²⁶And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. ²⁷ And I will put my Spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes and be careful to obey my rules.

Continual repentance is the only alternative way of life. True repentance is not a method of self-improvement or self-punishment, or even a way of attracting God's attention. Repentance is simply returning to God. Real repentance comes from the realisation that God already loves you in spite of the ugliness in your heart, and his love has washed you clean. Repentance crushes your old heart (the source of your old, self-centered way of living) and awakens the new heart he has given you (one which is like Christ's, the very one who died for you!), a heart that loves him and is full of strength and wonderful urges to do right and live honorably. Repentance also produces confidence, because it moves you from relying on yourself to relying on God's Spirit, which he has placed within you.

Real men get caught in a cycle of repenting to God, relying on God, and becoming renewed in God's image.

Real men know that in themselves they have nothing to offer, but in Christ they have nothing to prove - they have substance, because God by his grace has created it in them.

Real men know that in themselves they are weak, but in Christ they are strong. What does that mean? Only life, suffering, and repentance can teach you. At the very least, I know it means that it's your relationship with God which enables you to tackle life, and not your self. A man's strength originates from outside of himself.

Nothing is more important than knowing God.

5 Easy Ways to Waste Your Life

2009-08-04T16:32:00.034+10:00

Sleep in
You need to find a higher motivation than mere comfort (on all levels, not just physically). If all you can think about is staying comfortable, then you'll sleep in.

What time would you get up if God gave you a cheque for 24 hours from his time-bank, and asked you to spend it wisely? The hours of the day aren't a given right; they're entrusted to you by Someone else.
Work 'in' your life, without working 'on' your life
This is like taking a ship out to sea everyday without maintaining it, or checking the wind, or knowing your destination. You'll achieve nothing, and eventually sink or make shipwreck. You have to plan your life. Think ahead one month, one year, ten years... where do you want to be, and how will you get there? What are your priorities in life? What are your priorities today?

Always work 'on' your life, and never 'in' your life
This is like always building a ship, without ever taking it out on the water (like Henri from John Steinbeck's Cannery Row, who worked 7 years on a boat, but never set sail for fear of the sea). Forever making plans and casting visions is useless if you never take the first step.

Don't finish what you've started, and don't keep your promises
We can do this in the name of flexibility, to keep our options open (this describes me). But those reasonings often (not always) disguise a lack of commitment, and a lack staying power. Also, breaking promises (or alternatively, never making any) erodes people's trust, and breeds a sense of insecurity in the promise-breaker's life and those related to them.

Demand certainty
"If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts, but if he will content to begin with doubts, he shall end in certainties."
- Francis Bacon

Certainty is an enemy to those who ultimately trust in themselves; it is an invitation to adventure for those who ultimately trust in God. The only way to live with courage is to fear God more than uncertainty.

Killing the Old Self

2009-07-24T13:08:00.016+10:00

I'm learning that nothing can be done with the old self - the sinful nature - except to kill it. It can't be improved, it won't die by simply being understood, and it won't slink away of it's own accord - it must stabbed, slaughtered, bashed, burned. It should be understood only for one purpose - to find new and better ways of killing it. Christians should be very violent people.

Also, it can also only be resisted and killed by vivifying (bringing to life) the new self. The old self must be replaced as well as killed, or else it springs back up where it once was. Something must be preferred to the old way of life - the new way of the Spirit. And this is why slaughtering sin is happy business (it is difficult and sobering in other ways) - new life can spring up where death once was. Love supplants narcissism, courage conquers fear, hope destroys despair, freedom removes slavery. It's like removing weeds and pests from a garden, and watching flowers flourish in their place.

The Diet of Jesus Christ

2009-07-04T21:17:00.023+10:00

John 4:31-34
...the disciples were urging him, saying, "Rabbi, eat." But he said to them, "I have food to eat that you do not know about." So the disciples said to one another, "Has anyone brought him something to eat?" Jesus said to them, "My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to accomplish his work."

Food is something you need to live. It nourishes. It sustains. You get hungry for it. Food is something you receive. But Jesus speaks of something he does. Weird.

We can easily imagine receiving love as being like food. It's something that goes into us, and it nourishes. The only reason we live is because God's love gives us life. But Jesus is speaking of giving love as food (that is, if we understand obedience to the will of God correctly).

God commands us to love him and love others. I wonder if we demand too much of others because we fail to realise there is greater joy in giving than receiving? Does this have to do with the way God has made us? The consummation of experiencing God's love for us is found in loving him and loving others. Otherwise it doesn't nourish.

(I'm preaching mainly to myself here.)

What is deeply wrong with us is not that others fail to come through for us the way we want, but that we fail to provide quality relationship to others. And the root of that is our failure to be nourished by a good relationship with God - receiving from him in full dependence and worshiping him, committed to obeying his will.

We need to find our identity from our calling (to know God and represent him well to others) and not from our perceived needs. It's o.k. to long for more - don't worry, Christ is returning soon - but it is wrong to demand what we don't have and live for no higher purpose than getting it. Seeing yourself as an essentially needy human being robs you of your dignity. Seeing yourself as God's image-bearer and as responsible to bear that image well restores your dignity.

Question: are you hungry to do whatever God wants you to do? Are you thirsty to carry out his will? Is your greatest joy found in pleasing your Father? And do you pursue that hunger and thirst?
Or, are you mostly hungry for other things, and pursue them instead? Others' love and approval? Safety from bad things happening to you? Feeling good about yourself?

We were designed to live, to move into life with a freedom and energy that only comes from knowing God and pursuing him! We weren't made to sit on our spiritual butts, pathetically groping for proverbial chocolate bars and gorging ourselves on things which only leave us hungrier and never nourish.

Repent in brokenness in God's presence, know his forgiveness and his enabling power, and stand up - get some 'exercise' in worshiping him and loving others. Learn what Jesus meant when he said "My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to accomplish his work."

Things I Am Learning (part 2)

2009-06-28T13:35:00.002+10:00

God wants me to be more confident - specifically, that I am competent to do whatever he wants me to do, because my sufficiency is in Christ. He has kept bringing words and images to me through other people over the last couple of years, and recently - through prayer, prophecy or just simple encouragement - and it blows me away that he would keep giving me such assurance, especially when I tend to forget what he has said! I need to listen to him and trust his words more! He is truly amazing.
I need to pause, and think before I speak - to take time to listen properly, and to form my words. Sometimes (maybe more often than not) it's wiser not to speak at all. But when I have something to say, God doesn't want me wriggling my way out of it - a lack of courage is no reason to compromise convictions.
I'm discovering that my fear of conflict isn't a good thing. A desire for peace is... but sometimes conflict is necessary. Jesus caused conflict - read John 2:13-17 and Matthew 10:34. I want to become more like Jesus, and be wise enough to know when conflict is a necessary result of love, and even an act of love.

Things I Am Learning (part 1)

2009-06-24T17:20:00.021+10:00

I am insufficient, in and of my self, to maintain a passionate vision of what God wants to do for me and in me and through me and by me; I need a refresher from God every day, and I have to start from scratch every so often.
Asking good questions is very difficult, and requires a great deal more wisdom than answer-giving does.
God teaches wisdom by the Spirit, through Scripture, in times of suffering. When you ask God for wisdom, expect him to answer your prayer by those means. I'm not sure how often he gives wisdom to someone who isn't willing to learn it.
"The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it." (John 1:5). I'm learning to believe this passage. (I'll write a post about this one sometime).

I'm back

2009-06-21T22:00:00.001+10:00

I'll try not to delete this blog, not this time!

This is probably my third attempt at what you web-heads call 'blogging'. Every time I've tried it, I've either run out of things to write about or I haven't had the time (read: energy) to write - either way, it has meant my blogs have stagnated and have had to be put down.

But I figure now is a good season to start afresh, seeing as I have many spare hours for reading and thinking, and a lot of things for which I need to read and need think about. So I guess I'll find many topics to write about (or at least unfinished thoughts I'll want to jot down in case I forget them. Maybe blogging will force me to finish them).

I'll try to update more than once a month! Maybe I'll even update once a week...